F**k this stress S**t

I took 2 weeks off work because I needed a break . I haven’t had a vacation that was mine and not based on some else’s event in long time. I had a lot of plans, I was going to work out, was going to learn to crochet, clean out the house, read a lot, write a lot . . . the list went on and one. x3qrkgc

well, that didn’t happen. I had no idea how stressed out I had become. None. I slept for the first 3 days, literally slept all day. I got up, made breakfast, got the kid off to school, told the husband to have a good day and immediately lay down on the couch and slept until it was lunch. Picked up the kid, made lunch, took him back to school, slept some more. I had a migraine one day and had him stay at school for lunch just to sleep.

That’s all I did for 3 days was sleep. My immune system had enough of trying to keep up and just said fuck this shit, I’m letting you get sick. So then I was sick.

it took practically the whole week for me to actually feel well enough to do anything. What kind of staycation is that?? That’s not what I had planned, I accomplished nothing. NOTHING.

Lesson learned, stress will get you even if you don’t feel it at the moment. I didn’t know how to  slow down or let things go and it bit me in the arse.  I need to slow it down.  I need to let things go. I  don’t think I knew how to recognize actual stress before but I’m starting to now.

I’ve stopped the 90 day challenge, not completely but I’m re-working it. for this week, I IMG_20170304_154920_928just couldn’t do it. I didn’t have the motivation or the energy to be honest. its only now that I’m ready to change my daily routine so I don’t feel so chaotic. First step . . . I need to meditate every day with or with out some yoga. Either way, it needs to happen. Some kind of exercise needs to happen. I know I feel better mentally as well as physically but finding the motivation is hard. Healthy body needs healthy fuel, and that’s what I have to think of food as, fuel. Its not going to comfort

me, its not a cure for boredom or any other emotion I might be thinking it will be . . . .

So that is. 3 changes. 3 areas to focus on each day. Just 3.

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